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Abbott & Costello -
http://www.americanrhetoric.com/speeches/abbott&costell...
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world's funniest comedy routine ... Now let's see. We have on the bags, we have Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know's on third. ... ABBOTT: I say Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know's on third.
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Lou Costello's famous high-pitched squeal "I'm a b-a-a-a-d Boy!" came from one of his grade-school teachers, Mrs. Bessie Whitehead, who made him write the phrase on the blackboard one hundred times.
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Abbott: Nicknames, nicknames. Now, on the St. Louis team we have Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know is on third-- ... Abbott: I'm telling you. Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know is on third--
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There's also a text transcript included from another performance. Interestingly, while the general routine follows the same path, the small talk is quite different. It's amazing when you consider the boys' lightning fast delivery of this material and how a simple change in dialogue risks destroying the momentum and context...
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Timothy McSweeney's Internet Tendency ... CASHIER: Oh! I get it. That's funny. You thought I meant—right, OK. It's due the day after tomorrow. ... CASHIER: Because it's over the limit.
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Who's on First ... Costello: Goofe'; Abbott: Goofe' Dean. Well, let's see, we have on the bags, Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know is on third... Costello: That's what I want to find out. Abbott: I say Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know's on third.
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